Senator Joni Ernst Says to “Embrace” Jesus Instead of Actually Apologizing for Her Callous Behavior

You may recall last Friday, when the shebeen noted that its old friend, Senator Joni Ernst, Republican of Iowa and retired hog de-baller, got herself in a little fix. She answered a constituent’s question about the impact of the Medicaid cuts in the Big Plug Ugly Bill. First, she lied about its impact, and then she delivered an immortal line:

“We all are going to die.”

This struck most of the Intertoobz as the very wrong thing to say if you’re an elected official—or a breathing alleged human, for all that. So Joni, in true Republican fashion, responded with a snarky, wretched video filmed in, of all places, a cemetery. I was especially touched by her closing line.

Well, I happened to speak to J.H. Christ at his office in Lord and Savior, LLC, and he suggested that Senator Ernst go to the Iowa State Fair in August and embrace a McCormick reaper, blade first.